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–+ servings

The SHREK Cheese Board aka "Shrekuterie"

The Starving Chef
Unleash your inner ogre with this Shrek-inspired charcuterie board, featuring everything from Donkey's waffles and Fiona's fried "songbird" eggs to layers of oniony delights and iconic treats like muffins from the Muffin Man and Tic Tacs—perfect for any fun-loving gathering!
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Prep Time 1 day
Cook Time 2 hours
Total Time 1 day 2 hours
Course Charcuterie, Fictional Feasts
Cuisine Movies, Snack
Servings 1 Shrekuterie Spread

Equipment

Ingredients
  

Shrek's Stuffed Pumpkins

  • 2 mini pie pumpkins tops cut off and seeds removed
  • 1 cup orzo
  • ½ cup Andouille sausage
  • 1 tablespoon parsley
  • ¼ cup feta cheese
  • 3-4 tablespoons olive oil
  • ½ cup red sauerkraut (Cleveland Kraut is the perfect color!)

Fiona's Fried Eggs

  • 5-10 quail eggs
  • 5-10 croustini
  • 4-5 tablespoons pesto about 1 teaspoon per croustini
  • ½ teaspoon black pepper

Eyeball Jelly on Toast

  • 5-10 mozzarella pearls small-medium size
  • 2-3 pimento olives sliced for pupils
  • 2-3 pieces prosciutto
  • 5-10 croustini
  • 4-5 tablespoons lingonberries about 1 teaspoon per croustini

Rotisserie Weed Rat

  • 1 lb ground chicken
  • 4-5 eggs
  • 1 cup flour
  • 1 cup panko
  • 1 teaspoon Italian seasoning
  • 4-5 cups canola oil for frying
  • 2-3 strips bacon cut into "tails"

Pina Colada Dip

  • 8 oz cream cheese
  • 8 oz marshmallow creme
  • 8 oz crushed pineapple in syrup
  • 2 tablespoons shredded coconut
  • strawberries & pineapples chopped for serving

Renaissance Wraps

  • 2-3 tortilla wraps
  • 2-3 teaspoons horseradish sauce about 1 teaspoon per wrap
  • 2-3 tablespoons mayonnaise about 1 tablespoon per wrap
  • 8-10 slices roast beef 4-5 slices per wrap
  • 2-3 tablespoons roasted red peppers about 1 tablespoon per wrap
  • 1 cups lettuce

Ogre Blooming Onion

  • 1 box blooming onion mix
  • 1 onion
  • 3-4 tablespoons Southwest sauce or spicy ranch

Farquaad's Shortbread Cookies

  • 5-10 boxed shortbread cookies
  • blue writing icing

Pearl Onion Skewers

Extras

  • liege waffles
  • French onion jam
  • red grapes
  • saltines
  • wheat crackers
  • cinnamon crunch mini muffins
  • banana bread mini muffins
  • blue cheese
  • spicy cheese
  • sharp cheddar
  • Tictacs

Instructions
 

Shrek's Stuffed Pumpkins

  • Preheat the oven to 400°F. Prep the pumpkins by slicing off the top inch of each pumpkin and using a spoon to scoop out the insides. Scrape sides clean. Drizzle the insides and tops with oil and set aside.
  • Boil the orzo according to the instructions on the box and drain. In a large bowl, mix the cooked orzo with the sausage, feta, and parsley. Spoon the filling into each pumpkin all the way to the top. Set the pumpkin lids next to the pumpkins and bake until tender, about 25 minutes. Cool prior to serving.

Fiona's Fried Eggs on Toast

  • Heat a skillet over medium-low heat. Add the quail eggs and fry sunny-side up—about 2-3 minutes per egg. Remove from skillet and set aside. Spread pesto onto each crostini and place a single fried egg on top. Season with fresh cracked black pepper.

Eyeball Jelly on Toast

  • Slice the olives into rings for the pupils. Use a small knife to cut a circle at a 45-degree angle into each mozzarella ball and remove about 1/4 inch of mozzarella from the center. Place a slice of olive into the divot. Wrap with a small piece of prosciutto for upper and lower eyelids. Spread the lingonberry jam onto crostini. Place a single eyeball onto each crostini.

Rotisserie Weed Rat

  • Slice the bacon into strips that resemble rat tails. The bacon should be about twice as wide as the intended size because the bacon will shrink as it cooks. Wrap the strips around a skewer, starting about halfway down.
  • Form the ground chicken into a rat body shape around the bacon on the skewers—leave the rest of the 'tail' exposed. Freeze overnight.
  • Once frozen, prep three bowls for dredging—one with flour; one with whisked eggs; and one with panko. Dredge each rat in flour, then eggs, and then panko. Let the chicken thaw after being breaded for about an hour.
  • Bake at 400°F for 25-30 minutes or until golden brown. Alternatively, deep fry the skewered rats in a deep fryer at 400°F for 8-10 minutes. Cool prior to serving.

Pina Colada Dip

  • Use a hand mixer to blend together the room temperature cream cheese, marshmallow creme, and crushed pineapple. Mix until completely combined. Pour into a serving dish and top with shredded coconut.

Renaissance Wraps

  • Spread a teaspoon of horseradish and a tablespoon of mayonnaise onto each wrap. Top with roasted red peppers, roast beef, and lettuce. Wrap tightly in parchment paper. Secure with toothpicks. Chill until ready to serve, then use a sharp knife to cut the wraps into individual portions.

Blooming Ogre Onion

  • Prep and fry the onion according to the instructions on the packaging. Serve with Southwest sauce.

Farquaad's Shortbread Cookies

  • Use blue writing icing to make a lowercase "f" on each cookie. Chill to set the icing.

Pearl Onion Skewers

  • Thaw the pearl onions and drain. Add 8-10 onions onto each skewer. Drizzle with olive oil. Roast for 15-20 minutes at 400°F or air fry for 8-10 minutes at 425°F.

Assembly

  • Assemble the Shrekuterie with a "BEWARE OF OGRE" sign in the center of the spread. Provide small plates, toothpicks, serving spoons, forks, and knives to complete the spread. STAY OUTTA MY SWAMP!
Keyword charcuterie, cheese board
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